I wrote this back in August and was about to delete it, but God has pressed it onto my heart to share:

Not really sure where to begin this post.. as the past few months have felt like everyone has shared their own opinions whether or not in a graceful way.

The past months have felt like a heavy metal rock concert. Where everyone’s trying to yell their own opinions out into the world. Lots has surfaced on areas in which only Jesus’s redemption heals. So with all that said.. here’s a lil’ piece of my mind tonight..

I sit here with a heavy heart, watching as others are hurting, walking through dark caves and others are finding their flowered meadows.

I had a job interview back in May that turned out to be a dead end; or so I thought. Today I received an email from the lady re-offering the job, and my immediate reaction was, “Well God did say good things come to those who wait;” and it caught me in my tracks.

How many times do I truly stop and ask for God’s guidance, wait to hear what He has to say, and then praise Him when He comes through? What I’m learning is; God isn’t a big believer in quick fixes. He yearns for us to trust in Him while still walking through the darkness next to us. Through the turmoil and through the unrest it can be so easy to run to other options, find other facets or to simply give up and become disheartened with God’s timing not matching up to our own. I was so quick to believe this job was too “grown-up-ish” for me, yet God simply wanted me to rely on Him more when all other jobs fell through.

My heart goes to those who’s hearts are aching from the unrest and overwhelming unknowns that are filling their life story books.. but this is just a little small encouragement to remind you that just because the pages are unknown and full of unrest, God is still painting a beautiful story in your life, through you.

Page by page and piece by piece God is showing you the person He’s created you to be!! How crazy is that? So here’s a lil’ nugget of truth my little sister told me.. don’t make big decisions after 5pm. You can be so weighed down from the events, emotions and outcomes of the past day, that your judgement call may be off. This struck me real deep. How many times do I make decisions out of an emotional negative response rather than out of confidence and trust in the unknown? I am so quick to jump ahead, to dive out of the boat as it sails into the unknown waters, because I’m more confident in trying to figure out what’s next on my own, rather than sitting in the boat, sitting with peace and letting God show me what He has planned for my life, when He wants to show me.

So this is probably more so a lil’ reminder to myself than to you… but these are my last few words before signing off..

Stay in the boat. Even when you can see over the ledge and see what’s just below the surface, remember that there’s much more stuff deeper down that you can’t see. God created a boat to carry you for a reason.

Wait till the next morning to make a decision. When you make a decision in the moment, it’s choosing to decide what’s best through emotions rather than rational.

Lastly, remember that God loves to sit with you in the darkness. It may still feel scary, lonesome and heck, even fearful, but He has a shoulder to lean on and to whisper words of affirmation into your ears.

-Kyra Mariah